The View

ICLW'ers - Did any of you watch "The View" today? I TiVoed it specifically because I heard the entire show was going to be devoted to talking about infertility.

Sadly, I didn't learn anything new. I suppose I'm beyond the basics at this point! What I did come away with was frustration toward Whoopi Goldberg. Giuliana DePandi and her husband Bill (of "Giuliana and Bill") were on the show discussing their struggles with infertility. They have been trying to get pregnant for over a year and have been very open about their journey. Giuliana seems to have several things working against her, including anovulation. Giuliana explained that her doctor recommended that she gain 5-10 pounds to encourage ovulation and she has, thus far, gained only 5. Whoopi, in a very condescending tone, told her that she needed to work on gaining more, that perhaps she wasn't ready to get pregnant or have a baby, and generally implied that Giuliana isn't trying hard enough.

Now, listen. I'm sure that woman tips that scales at 110, and she's tall. Sure, gaining another 5-10 pounds might do her some good. But how dare Whoopi criticize her like that. I'm sure she feels terrible as it is -- there are a lot of emotions and self-blame that go along with infertility. Women (and men) dealing with it certainly don't need criticism from other people, especially those that have no idea what they're talking about. This is a giant pet-peeve of mine. People need love, encouragement, and support from those around them, not criticism and judgement.

Facebook Babies

Honestly, it feels like 1/2 of my News Feed is filled with baby updates. Some friends have even changed their profile picture to a picture of their baby. Not them with their baby -- just their baby. Weird. Either that, or a belly picture. Even from the thumbnail, I know. I'd recognize that full-body-profile-shot from miles away. This is somehow worse than baby pictures. Harder to take, that is.

I learn about friends' pregnancy cravings. How far along they are. How often their little soon-to-be bundle of joy is kicking. I hear them complain about how uncomfortable they are. How much trouble they are having trying to sleep at night. Soon, I hear about the birth. Dilation. Effacement. Lots of pictures. Congratulations. Then, how little time they have to themselves anymore. Their baby's bathroom schedule and habits (gross, btw). First words. Milestones. Happy family photos.

I'm insanely jealous of all of the above, but I suppose that goes without saying. I'm also incredibly annoyed by it, but I think that goes along with the jealousy. I find myself cursing at these women under my breath. Making snide comments. Again with the jealousy. Perhaps I will, one day, be one of these women that I secretly loathe. And maybe then I, too, will want to shout every little detail from the rooftops (except for bathroom schedules. again, gross.) Until then, I will continue on as usual. Because really, boycotting Facebook is not an option, as I am a card-carrying addict.

A Few Small Repairs

Warning: TMI alert.

I started my period yesterday. On my own. Again. 33 days after the last one. Huh.

Second time in a row! It's (almost) like I'm a normal 28 year old girl!

I am somewhat encouraged by this. I'm not sure if it's the yoga, supplements, 9 pound weight loss, or just good luck, but I'm thankful for this step in the right direction!

We will probably "skip" this cycle, in terms of medication, as we want to get the HSG taken care of before diving in again.

HSG and Acupuncture

I called my RE's office today. On February 4, RE sent our insurance company a more official request to have the Hysterosalpingogram be covered. Hopefully we will hear back from them soon, but I'm not holding my breath considering the last response we received was practically automated and took them over two months.

I've also been considering acupuncture, as I've heard that it can be an effective way to combat infertility in some women. I haven't done a lot of research yet, but I'd be willing to give it a whirl. I'd be willing to participate in 99% of Fear Factor stunts if it meant getting pregnant. Being covered in tarantulas, jumping out of a 19th story window, eating bull testicles, what have you.

I need to find out when it is recommended (timing within the cycle), how much it would cost, whether or not it would be covered by insurance, and the best place/person in the Ind.iana.polis area for the job.

Currently feeling...

• Angry
• Left Out
• Left Behind
• Hopeless
• Frustrated
• Unable to properly deal with all of the above.
• In need of a stiff drink.